Revealing the good, the bad, and the strange of paid companionship

The recent popularity of sugar baby relationships as an easy way for college students to make money has led to a great deal of discussion. Shows like Secret Diary of a Call Girl which have depicted women who are in control of their sexual identity and are empowered through a mutually beneficial agreement, were certainly appealing to me. Getting paid to go on a date with a lonely, rich stranger was a more attractive prospect than working a mundane retail job, especially because I would be making significantly more money on an hour-long date versus an 8-hour shift in retail hell. I was introduced to this world through friends-of-friends that had joined sites like SeekingArrangement.com and whatsyourprice.com, telling me of their experience as a sugar baby. So with time to spare over the summer and a desire to not waste away my days, I created an account for myself. Here began the start of my adventure.

My profile description was nothing stimulating, but instead a mere honest depiction of the girl-next-door studying humanities with a passion for fashion and travel. Quickly the offers started coming in. The way whatsyourprice.com is designed is that once you set a price for a date, the sugar daddy or mommy has to unlock a conversation with you- meaning that if they are serious about meeting, they will have to pay to be able to message you. This prevents people who are not serious about such arrangements from wasting your time. Within the first couple of weeks, I had set up a number of first dates at expensive restaurants.

The men I went on dates with were all older and had enough money to spend it frivolously. They spent outrageous amounts on some nights- money on wine and dinner for two, drinks at a lounge, cab rides to locations all across the city, and on top of that- the price that I set for the date (approximately $200) sometimes slipping me an added bonus. They showed obvious signs of a mid-life crisis, were recently or almost retired and had no idea what do with their hard-earned money- except maybe to purchase a new sports car. Most importantly, they were all looking for companionship. These men who are looking for a sugar baby want their egos to be petted and to feel young and important again. That is the purpose of the arrangement, but most prefer to think that you are truly interested in their life and feelings. The conversation revolves around them, while you ask the right questions to get them talking. All I had to do was smile prettily, laugh at their jokes, and utter a remark of disbelief at the right moment.

These men are paying for a date and your companionship. You are in control of the relationship and where it leads, and that is why such arrangements can be ideal. It’s mutually beneficial, there are terms and boundaries set, and you work as your own boss. However, these companionships aren’t meant for everyone. Often, these men are commanding, rude, love to brag, and believe they’re paying for a service- so they expect exactly what they want in return. If they don’t feel that your attention is genuine and whole-hearted, they will get frustrated and cut the date short. Remember- you only get paid in the end, which means you’re working throughout the entire meeting. While there’s benefit in being paid to feign interest in someone, doing it for too long can surely distort self-image to valuing yourself through a physical cost. Certain safety measures as well need to be put in place. But with research and the right mind-set it can most definitely pay off. I myself have stopped using these sites, and while I wouldn’t promote this way of earning money, it was certainly a novel experience. If you’re curious about a world of paid companionship, proceed- but do so with caution.

Featured image courtesy of Veronica Prokopovych