Fool’s Gold: Abridged
1: Welcome, traveller! In this world, your choices matter. Follow the directions beside each prompt to find the next part of your story. This, for example, is section 1. When prompted by the phrase “Roll initiative!”, you may use a six-sided die or a random number generator to leave each challenge to the fates.
Now, tell me: what kind of adventurer are you?
- A burly fighter [go to 4]
- A musical bard [go to 13]
2: Unfortunately, the fury of the furry creature is too much for you. The last thing you see is a bundle of sharp teeth glinting in the light of the dying fire.
AN UNBEARABLE DEATH. TRY AGAIN?
3: You make your way towards the city centre. Your guild is up ahead, settling around the fountain in the square.
You unstrap your banjo from your rucksack. You look towards your guild, each of whom is pulling out their tools of the trade: a flute, a frame drum, and tin cans filled with dried beans. It’s showtime!
After your first song, a thin man with a curly moustache pushes his way through the cheering crowd.
“Splendid, splendid, my dears. I would be honoured if you might join my lord’s caravan for the evening. He’s looking for something to occupy his mind as we traverse the mountain pass — and he pays well.”
You cannot help but agree. You join the caravan, which is decked out with riches beyond your wildest imaginings. They even have a baby dragon!
Cautiously, you and your guild traverse the mountainside, playing songs of yore, until you hear a shrill cry.
An ambush! A guild of bandits is attacking you!
- Distract with insults [go to 5]
- Distract with music [go to 8]
4: A fighter! Of course.
On a splendid afternoon, you and your guild of muscular men stomp into the local tavern after a morning of hunting. Sadly, your mission was unsuccessful; your stomach rumbles and your coin sack feels light at your hip.
The tavern is empty, save for the bartender and a raggedy-looking man at a table in the corner. The raggedy man pipes up: “Seems like y’all could use a silver or two; take this. A gift.” He hands you some yellow parchment with a simply sketched map. Desperate for money, you and your guild decide to follow it.
After walking for quite some time, you stumble upon a cave.
- Rest in the cave [go to 14]
- Keep following the map [go to 10]
5: You dodge the nearest bandit’s attack, then point at them ferociously, expertly picking apart their mother’s honour with your words. The bandit scowls and rushes you, only to be thrown off the face of the mountain by one of your companions. Their dying screams fade into the wind. How’s that for a performance?
After each of the bandits has fallen, you take up your post at the rear of the gilded caravan and march onwards, playing a victorious tune.
A RAVISHING DISPLAY! BUT THE SHOW MUST GO ON. ENCORE?
6: You call your brothers-in-arms to encircle the bandits, who are swiftly dispatched. You all let free a celebratory howl, take a swig of brown liquor from a shared vessel, and continue up the mountain path.
At the summit sits a small cobblestone fountain, in which there are many gold coins.
- Take some coins [go to 12]
- Leave it be [go to 17]
7: You whip around to face the woman, stomping your foot on the ground. The loud THUMP bounces between the walls, and sparks of magical remnant fly from your boots; the cobblestone beneath your feet seems to ripple. The woman shrieks and runs the other way. You sigh in relief. You are free to join your comrades again.
- [Go to 3]
8: As you wield your banjo in the face of an oncoming bandit, they pounce and strike the instrument in two! Your weapon of choice, or what remains of it, falls off the side of the mountain, and you are left defenceless as the bandit twists a dagger into your belly.
THAT’S SHOWBIZ. TRY AGAIN?
9: Before you have a chance to retaliate, you feel a sleepiness growing. Everything fades before you.
You awake with a start, surrounded by stalagmites barely made out in the dim light. You feel groggy. How long have you been out?
You feel a lot…heavier than you remember. And your teeth feel a lot bigger too. And something about your skin feels soft. So soft…
Time for a nap.
AN UNBEARABLE VICTORY. TRY AGAIN?
10: You continue following the map, which eventually leads you to a narrow path along the edge of a steep mountain. You feel dizzy as you look down at the tiny trees and rocks below. Cautiously, you and your guild traverse the mountainside until you hear a shrill cry. An ambush! A guild of bandits is attacking you!
- Retaliate solo [go to 15]
- Work with your guild [go to 6]
11: You whip out your sword — a clean slice to the throat! The bear does not see it coming. In fact, it looks almost peaceful as it falls to the ground.
You and your guild decide that it is too dangerous to remain here.
- [Go to 10]
12: You and your men fish out coins, amassing an impressive stack. You graciously leave some gold behind for whoever might come along next. All in a day’s work!
A FLAWLESS VICTORY! TRY AGAIN?
13: A bard! Of course.
On a splendid afternoon, you and your guild of tumultuous troubadours are headed toward the town square to busk. Your recent performances have not been successful; your stomach rumbles and your coin sack feels light at your hip.
Out of the corner of your eye, down an alleyway, you spot a shadowy figure watching you. She beckons.
- Approach the figure [go to 16]
- Continue on with your guild [go to 3]
14: You set up camp in the cave and make a small fire. As you and your guild begin to drift off for a quick nap, you are hit with a strong scent: wet rags and red anger.
You jump from where you lie and turn around to look deeper into the cave, only to find yourself nose-to-nose with a bear! [Roll initiative!]
- 1-3 [go to 2]
- 4-6 [go to 11]
15: As you move towards the nearest bandit and brandish your sword, another bandit slices at your knees. They buckle, and you find yourself tumbling off the face of the mountain. Not exactly the most dignified way for a warrior to go.
DEATH BY GRAVITY. TRY AGAIN?
16: The figure’s energy is irresistible; you feel a bit sleepy. You cannot help but investigate further.
You follow her deeper into the alleyway. After a while, she turns to face you. “I have an irresistible opportunity for a lad like thee. Too good to refuse, yes, yes.” She leans in closer. She smells of lilac and gooseberries.
“I seek a business partner. For a small fee, I would give thee a variety of commodities that thou may sell for thine own profit. Thou could even, dare I say, become thine own king by recruiting others: double, no, quadruple thine profits! Ha, ha!”
Despite the temptations of the shadowy woman, you politely decline her offer and turn back towards the main street.
“WAIT! Where art thou going?!”
She is huffing and puffing behind you. You are not going to get away that easily! [Roll initiative!]
- 1-3 [go to 9]
- 4-6 [go to 7]
17: Let me get this straight: you came all the way up here, fought through all of that, just to refuse a reward? Fine. More for me.
YOU WIN…I GUESS? TRY AGAIN?