Love is in the air, and as your (totally qualified) doctor, I am obliged to warn you about the myriad of infections and inconveniences that come along with it. This is not me being your creepy gym teacher lecturing you on abstinence, because it is your right to make decisions about what to do with your body. Also you wouldn’t listen. But it is me telling you to be smart, and to think with your head instead of your… heart.  

What to do if the condom breaks

And I am saying “if it breaks,” not “if neither of you had a condom and you decided that you’d just go without one.” Taking an emergency contraceptive is not harmful, but it is certainly not a pleasant experience. Some etiquette: the person who is not at risk of pregnancy is the one who a) goes out in the cold in the morning after to buy it and b) pays the $40 for one tiny pill surrounded by way too much packaging. In Ontario they are sold over-the-counter, so while you will have to ask a pharmacist in person, you will not have to provide any personal information and can choose to pay cash so there is no record of purchase.

Plan B works by preventing ovulation and closing off the cervix. Once you take the pill, you will have a stomachache. You will be dizzy and nauseous. Your next period will be weird — prepare for it a few days ahead of time because it may be early, and stock up on your painkillers of choice. While Plan B is safe to use with any medication, be careful with mood-altering substances in the three or four days following it. Plan B can affect your tolerance; I’ve seen people who should be tipsy and relaxed turn blackout and paranoid. 

If you were sleeping with someone who you don’t know well, I’d also recommend going to get screened for any sexually transmitted infections. Better an afternoon and an inconvenience now than carrying syphilis around. If they don’t call you back, that means you don’t have any STIs. 

Just in case

The sooner you take Plan B, the more effective it is — if you take it within 24 hours, 19 out of 20 times you have nothing to worry about. Still, Plan B does nothing if the sperm had already reached the egg before you took it, or the cervix didn’t close early enough and some sperm made it past. If you skip your next period, or it looks strangely light, take a pregnancy test. You will not have to answer any questions and you can choose to pay cash so there will be no record. Buy two — occasionally, a test will be a dud and will not tell you whether or not you are pregnant. It will probably be negative, since you did everything right. If it isn’t, call the Women’s College Hospital. 

Since you found out before 4 weeks gestation, the embryo is smaller than your fingernail right now. The pictures you see in pro-life propaganda are lies — an embryo of that age looks like a loose ball of cells less than one centimetre across, far from a fetus and even further from a real newborn. 

(Pregnancy tissue after 5 weeks, from Poppy Noor of the Guardian)

Should you choose so, you will be provided with two pills. The first, mifepristone, will dilate your cervix to unattach the embryo from the wall of your uterus, cutting it off from nutrients. The second, misoprostol, will trigger a heavy period to flush it out of your body. Misoprostol is taken 24 hours later, at home, and is absolutely necessary. The embryo is already dead, and it is dangerous to leave it inside of you. Stay home for the next day — the embryo will be passed in the next 24 hours and you need to be close to a toilet when it happens, because there will be more blood than what you might expect on your average period. Cramps may be severe but they are normal and last about a day, though it is important to note here that your next period will be unpredictable. Additionally, should you decide an abortion isn’t the choice for you, fertilized eggs are not harmed by Plan B so it will likely be viable, but you need to find an OB-GYN.

From campus, there are numerous places you can go for support. The Health and Wellness Centre at U of T (700 Bay, right across from Sick Kids) gives same-day appointments for sexual health. Women’s College Hospital Bay Centre takes drop-in appointments, though you will have to wait a while (76 Grenville, between Queen’s Park and College subway stations). Planned Parenthood Toronto needs you to book an appointment over the phone but is very careful about your email and often does not ask for a health card, permitting you to give a fake name (36B Prince Arthur, northeast of St. George subway station).