You know that weird, liminal period of time during winter break, after the holidays have passed, but before school starts again? It’s 1:38 AM and you’re languishing in your room, looking outside at your suburban neighbourhood. The winter sky refuses to turn pitch-black—it’s this eerie, foggy, murky grey-blue colour—and the houses on your street still have their Christmas lights up, but they haven’t turned them on for days. You feel a strange sadness, but you feel guilty about it because damn it, this was supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year! And yet, all you can bring yourself to do is put on the saddest playlist you have and lie facedown on your bed, head buried in the pillow. Well, this is that playlist.

It starts off with Julia Jacklin lyrically painting a melancholic picture of a depressing family party (so much for the holiday spirit, am I right?), then transitions into Phoebe Bridgers somberly—yet tenderly—reflecting on Christmas while convincing herself that the new year will be better. The next seven songs are soft, subdued, and understated. Then, it suddenly escalates with the last three songs, all of which are dreamlike, transcendent, and almost otherworldly; crescendoing with the last two verses of “Teenage Blue”. 

My favourite lyric (“Did you ever see a night so long / When time goes crawling by / The moon just went behind the cloud / I’m so lonesome I could cry”) perfectly encapsulates the mood and atmosphere that this playlist creates. For 45 minutes and 3 seconds, it seems like you’re the only one who exists in the world, and you’re conflicted about whether you should revel in that feeling or try to get rid of it, because, God, you’re just so lonely. Hopefully, you can take some comfort (or, more realistically, experience a catharsis) through these songs. 

Tracklist

1. Baby Jesus is nobody’s baby now — Julia Jacklin
2. If We Make It Through December — Phoebe Bridgers
3. cardigan (cabin in candlelight version) — Taylor Swift
4. I’m So Lonesome I Could Cry — Yo La Tengo
5. Pale Blue Eyes — The Velvet Underground
6. Reflections After Jane — The Clientele
7. Baby Blue — King Krule
8. Some things Cosmic — Angel Olsen
9. The Moon Song — beabadoobee, Oscar Lang
10. Andromeda — Weyes Blood
11. Space Song — Beach House
12. Teenage Blue — Dreamgirl